Garage Band

Last week after our loss to Shack, we had the Moody Blues and this week we were in for Coldplay in Muddy Waters.  The grungy weather was playing a Cheap Trick on us, and we weren't sure if we'd be Marooned by 5 p.m.  We feared we may have to wait 'Til Tuesday next week to play.

But the show was on and our Men at Work were plugged in, amped up, and ready to hit the rock with soul.  With an 0-1 record, it may have appeared that the Cougars were in Dire Straits.  But our team is a Survivor and we knew it was just The Time to administer The Cure to Fixx our losing record.

The Cougars swung our metal Styx and Supertrampled Gullivers.  Our score was INXS of theirs, 20-15.  The Cougars' cheering in Wilmette could be heard from Chicago to Boston, and JOx reported even hearing us  in Flo Rida. 

Our wet hands imitated air guitar but we played a Tenacious D.  The Outfield had a Knack for catching almost everything in their track.  In spite of a few Petty Heartbreaker calls out there by the umpire, we never got out of tune.

Although we scored every inning, our A-Ha moment came in the fifth inning when the Cougars went from Boyz II Men as we rapped hit after hit.

As you may have guessed, these liner notes will also be printed in Rolling Stone this week.  Our Mamas and Papas would be proud.

• Ski put a Sting on the ball all night and had sticky fingers in the field.
• Steely Dan Hogs played excellent offense and defense and was one of the only Cougars without an error.
• The only sound we heard from JD's bat was Wham!
• DD was the BB King of the mound, not letting his Badfinger affect him, as his strikes struck a chord over and over.
• Bobi crushed the ball to Linkin Park and even the Police couldn't stop him on the bases.
• Diddy was, well, Diddy. 
• The Jokewriter was no Foreigner to double vision, as he Journeyed to the second bag three consecutive times. 
• Philthy was Extremely filthy from sliding into home plate so many times.
• Boom Creamed the ball and Rushed around the bases.

Like any aging Starr, we played to a small crowd even though our ticket price is less than 50 Cent.  An Offspring was there, LL Cool J (Little Lipsey Cool Jimmy).   My Queen who has my Heart, JRads, is such a faithful fan she would watch through stormy Earth, Wind and Fire.  The two of them created a Quiet Riot by screaming like 10,000 Maniacs.

After the Cougars won last year's championship, everyone asked "The Who?"  The Talking Heads said it was just Ludacris to think of a repeat and that we would be Pretenders this year.  After our performance yesterday, we established that they are merely Simple Minds.

After the game we went backstage to enjoy the adult Ice-Ts that were on Ice Cubes.  Demonstrating that U2 can join us each week, our Culture Club welcomed a few Shackers at the post-game.  We enjoyed their Bad Company and drank the Poison with them.  

The Cougars burned the Midnight Oil determined not to get any REM sleep and leaving No Doubt that we are best garage band in town.  You can see it right here in Living Colour.  It was quite a Green Day.  

 Join us next week at 7:00 for this garage band's encore as we seek to make the Tappers lose their rhythm.